The Shipping Forecast
by Amrywiol
Summary: One day I had the idea to write a drabble for every ship I could think of. This is the result. (Updated 31/07/20 with two new chapters and 17/09/20 with one new chapter.)
1. Jeff,Annie

Post 2.3

"Are you _studying?"_ Annie's arrival took Jeff by surprise. He looked up from the Ethics coursebook he'd been reading in a booth in the cafeteria and took a good look at her - her hair was still slightly damp from the shower she'd taken to get the oil out and she was wearing a sweatshirt several sizes too large for her. _Probably borrowed from Troy, _he thought.

"No, I was having a coffee and –" he waved his cup in support of what he was saying but found himself unable to finish the sentence when he saw the expression on her face, a heartbreaking mixture of fear and rejection.

"What can I do for you, Annie?" He said instead, gesturing to the seat opposite him.

"Did you mean what you said?" She asked him as she slid into the seat.

Jeff honestly had no clue what she was referring to. "It's been a busy day Annie…"

"You said you couldn't believe you made out with me," she blurted out.

_Oh crap_, Jeff thought. _That's why she's looking like someone shot her puppy?_

"I said I couldn't believe I made out with _both_ of you," he corrected her. She replied with her best _this isn't helping, Jeff _frown.

Jeff sighed and condescended to explain further. "Do you remember what was going on at the time?" He said. "The two of you were engaged in some sort of passive aggressive competition to decide who was the dullest and most uninteresting, grunting out one word answers and failing to make eye contact," Jeff looked straight into her eyes as though driving home his own point. "Dull and uninteresting women are not my scene, hence…" he smiled apologetically as he finished.

Her expression had relaxed, but she still looked puzzled. "Does that mean…?" she asked hesitantly.

"Annie," Jeff said firmly. "There are a lot of words I'd use to describe you when you're not trying to fit in with somebody else's view of how you're supposed to behave," he grinned in a way that made her blush slightly. "But 'dull and uninteresting' are not amongst them."

Annie's expression relaxed into a full beam. "So," she said. "_Were_ you studying?"

"Oh crap," Jeff said half-heartedly. "Well, if you're going to stay you might as well make yourself useful." He passed the textbook he'd been reading across the table. "Test me," he finished grandly.

Annie took one look at the title - _An Introduction to Moral Philosophy, _by _Professor Chidi Anagonye, PhD_ \- and turned happily to the sample questions at the end of the first chapter.


	2. Troy,Abed

(Post 1.15)

"Cut!" Abed said.

"What is it this time?" Troy sighed.

"My wig came loose," Abed said as he sat up and adjusted the hairpiece in question.

"Dude, you need to pin it on better." Troy said, also sitting up and stretching slightly.

"I can't," Abed explained. "That'll create a continuity error. You need to be more careful when you touch it." He got up, walked over to the camera, adjusted its position slightly and re-set the timer.

"Fine," Troy sighed again. "I'll keep my hands lower."

Troy's forehead crinkled suddenly as though in thought. "Is it weird that this gets less weird each time we do it?" He asked.

"No," Abed said. "It just means we're identifying with our characters. Ready?" Abed resumed his position lying back on the study room couch as Troy moved to loom over him.

"Kickpuncher: The Return of Punchkicker sex scene - Take seventeen." Abed said. "Five, four, three, two, and…." he pouted suddenly as the timer ran down and Troy leaned in.


	3. Jeff,Britta

_BreeeepBrip-BreeeepBrip-Bree-_

"Uuuurghhh…" Jeff groaned as he awoke, rolled over and viciously slammed his fist down on the snooze button of his alarm clock. Rubbing the side of his head to try to smooth away the headache from his hangover that had been inflamed by his alarm he sat up, looked around blearily, and on seeing the bed was otherwise empty forced himself to get up and stagger to the bathroom.

Half an hour later, after having showered, shaved and most importantly thrown a handful of Tylenol and a pint of water down his throat and a designer silk bathrobe on his body he headed into the main room of his apartment.

"It's alive," Britta snarked.

Jeff stopped moving and turned in the direction the voice had come from. Britta was sitting in a chair, her blonde hair fetchingly dishevelled and her bare feet resting on the breakfast bar. She was wearing what appeared to be one of Jeff's dress shirts and not much else while she held a magazine in one hand and a piece of toast in the other.

He paused for a moment, openly admiring the view. Britta glared back at him.

"Don't drip honey on that shirt, it cost over 200 bucks." He snarked.

Britta ostentatiously held the toast in the air, slowly rotated it while grinning at the sudden tense expression on Jeff's face. She lowered it again and rested it on a plate just as he was gathering himself to leap across the breakfast bar. Jeff relaxed imperceptibly and turned to pour himself a mug of coffee.

"So what do you want to-" but he never got to finish his sentence.

_Doodleyip, doodleyip, doodleyip…_

Britta cursed, got to her feet and scrambled in search of her phone. Jeff watched her as he ambled over to the breakfast bar and took his own seat. He looked on with mild amusement as she recognised the caller ID, jammed her thumb against a button to reject the call and threw the phone angrily into the sofa before stomping back to the breakfast bar.

"Telemarketer?" Jeff asked.

"Worse," Britta said. As she swung her feet back up to the bar, Jeff learned forward slightly, took a firm grip on them and planted them in his lap. Britta raised an eyebrow but let him.

"It was my mom," she said.

"Good call." Jeff agreed. Britta sighed slightly and relaxed as he idly dug his thumb into the ball of her left foot.

XXXXXX

"_And Britta makes me feel like the guy I am three weeks after New Year's, when I'm back to hitting my snooze button and screening Mom's phone calls, back to who I really am."_ \- Pascal's Triangle Revisited.


	4. Annie,Abed

(Immediately post 2.24)

"And now he'll come slinking back in five, four, three, two…" Jeff grinned and gestured at the door.

The silence that followed as it sank in to them all that Pierce wasn't coming back was impossibly awkward. Shirley was the first to break it, muttering something about needing to check on her children. Jeff offered Troy a ride as an excuse to say something other than his failed prediction, the two of them leaving in Shirley's wake. Britta followed, an expression of surprisingly genuine pain on her face.

"Abed," Annie said as the only other remaining member of the study group picked up his bag and stood up. "We need to talk."

He raised an eyebrow slightly. "About what, Annie?"

Annie gasped in shock. "We _kissed, _Abed!"

"No we didn't."

Annie gasped again.

"That's twice you've done that now," Abed said. "You need to be careful, it'll become a cliche if you do it too often and the audience won't take you seriously."

Annie bit back the urge to gasp again. "Abed! How could you say -"

"Annie and Abed didn't kiss," Abed interrupted. "Princess Leia and Han Solo did. It was the necessary conclusion to the story arc."

"Oh," Annie visibly deflated. "The story. I-I- get that." he hands shook slightly as she picked up her bag and turned to walk out. "Ha-have a nice summer…"

"Annie-" Abed called to her retreating back.

"Yes, Abed?" Annie stopped, but couldn't bring herself to turn and face him.

"Princess Leia is a strong, smart and brave woman who also happens to be a really good kisser. Han Solo is really lucky to have her in his life."

Annie didn't say anything, nor did she turn around. But a small smile did spread across her face as she resumed walking out.


	5. Annie,Britta

(Post S4)

"Why can't they just be in alphabetical order?" Britta grumbled. It was getting late and they were studying for an Astronomy test the following day and she had failed - for the third time - to recite correctly the usual order of stellar classifications.

Annie wasn't sure either, but she wasn't about to admit ignorance to her friend. "Look," she sighed. "I can give you a mnemonic-" she paused at the expression on Britta's face -"oh, don't tell me you don't know what a mnemonic is!" she gasped in exasperation.

Britta looked defensive. "It's a way of getting you to remember something by making you think of something completely different!" she yelped suddenly.

Annie instinctively started to correct her. "That's-" then she paused, allowing a surprised smile to spread across her face "-actually not bad."

Brita responded with a small, relieved smile of her own. "Okay-" Annie said, returning to the subject at hand. "Repeat after me - Oh Be A Fine Girl Kiss Me Right Now Sweetheart." She started fine, but found herself blushing as she saw Britta's eyes open wide as the sentence developed and barely managed to squeak out the last few words.

"Erm, your turn." Annie added after a moment.

Britta smiled with fond amusement at the sight of her friend bright red with embarrassment.

"That's okay, I think I've got it." She said, beaming back.

XXXXXX

Author's note: this is an absolutely genuine mnemonic for remembering stellar classifications...


	6. Troy,Annie,Abed

(Shortly after S3.7)

"Why did we have to see that movie again?" Troy said, breaking the subdued silence that had overtaken the three friends since they had left the cinema.

"It's the classic cinematic depiction of a relationship between two men and one woman. I thought it would be useful to know what we are getting in to now Annie is living with us," Abed said.

Annie glared at her friend. "I'm 'sharing an apartment'-" she made quotation marks in the air with her fingers "-with you Abed, not 'living with you'." She repeated the gesture.

Abed was unfazed. "I think the key lesson is that it will unbalance our friendship just as much if you sleep with both of us as it would if you slept with just one," he said blandly. "I thought it would keep things in balance, but-"

"ABED!" Annie squawked in shocked outrage. "I will not be sleeping with either of you, and especially not both! And why is it down to me-"

"I think the important lesson is-" Troy, who had been too busy with own thoughts to listen to what the others were saying, interrupted her flow. "What?" For the first time, he noticed the expressions on the others' faces as he interrupted their discussion.

"Please Troy - carry on," Annie hissed, part irritated by the distraction and part welcoming it.

"I think the important lesson is that you have to promise us both that you won't force one of us into your car and drive off a bridge leaving the other all alone." Troy said. "Because that would be really sad for whoever was left behind."

Annie smiled softly at the serious expression on his face. "Troy, trust me – I won't be driving off any bridges unless all three of us are in the car."

"Yay!" Troy said with a huge grin. "All for one-"

"Wrong movie." Abed interrupted. "Pancakes?"

"Pancakes." Troy nodded in agreement.

"Pancakes." Annie added her agreement, linking arms with the boys as the three of them marched in unison down the road.

XXXXXX

Author's note: it's not mentioned in the story, but the movie they saw was "Jules et Jim", Francois Truffaut's new wave masterpiece about what happened when two best friends fell in love with the same woman.


	7. Troy,Annie

(Riverdale High, Spring 2008)

Troy swaggered through the school gates, a broad smile on his face as he acknowledged the crowds parting for him.

"T-Bone!" A voice cried out.

Troy looked around, spotted a figure limping towards him, a crutch under his left arm.

"A-Rod!" He called back cheerfully to the injured Linebacker. He held out his hand for a high five, the other footballer shifted his weight slightly and returned it.

"Dude, you were _awesome _in the game last night!" Alex Rodgers - A-Rod - said.

Troy's grin got even wider. "Yeah, I -" then it slipped slightly. "It would have been even better if you were there dude." He added sadly.

"Gotta rest it up so I'm ready for when the college scouts come," A-Rod said, gesturing with his crutch.

"Yeah, the scouts…" Troys expression clouded even further before a fixed smile returned. His reply however went unsaid.

"_Watch where you're going, nerd!" _Troy whipped around to locate the source of the - high pitched, female - screech, his gaze settling on a pair of girls in cheerleader uniforms standing over a somewhat drably dress girl who was on her hands and knees trying to gather up her books while the cheerleaders shoved her.

"What's going on?" Troy's usually sunny expression had been replaced with a puzzled frown.

"Cheerleaders -" A-Rod started to answer but stopped when he realised Troy was no longer there.

xxxxxx

"Heeeyyy, wassup?" Troy called out as he approached the cheerleaders standing over the other girl, a carefree smile once again in place on his face.

"Troy!" The first one said, immediately forgetting the target of her teasing as she stood up straight and hurriedly brushed her skirt into place.

"Hi Troy…" the other girl said, trying for a more seductive tone of voice.

So, my friend over there -" Troy, his pose radiating casual confidence, pointed to A-Rod who was now twenty feet away and looking completely baffled.

"-needs some help with his bags. You girls wouldn't be willing to give him a hand, would you?"

"Sure Troy!" The first one flashed him a brilliant, if slightly puzzled, smile and skipped over to where Troy's friend was waiting.

"Both of you?" Troy said to the other, who hadn't moved.

"Sure Troy…" this in a much more puzzled tone of voice.

"See you at break, babe." Troy added encouragingly as the cheerleader reluctantly moved away.

He watched for a second to make sure she had left, then dropped to ground level where the third girl had barely moved during the whole exchange.

"It's-it's alright…" she stammered as he helped her gather up her books. She was too frightened to make eye contact, so Troy simply reached out, took gentle hold of the point of her chin, and tilted her head until she was forced to look at him. Her face was clean of makeup, but with signs of acne and her hair was a frizzled mess. Her eyes however, even behind ugly bottle glasses, were the most startling shade of blue.

"I'm Troy," he said, still smiling but rather more softly than he had for the cheerleaders. "What's your name?"

"A-Annie," the girl stammered. "We're in algebra class together…" she barely whispered the last words, every ounce of her being distracted by the feel of Troy's hand on her chin.

"Yeah, I bet you're better at it than I am." Troy said, his grin back in force as he gestured with the books he'd picked up before handing them back. "Maybe you can tutor me sometime."

"S-sure," Annie squeaked, she was so shocked she could barely talk.

Troy stood up, Annie followed him. "I've got to go now, I'll see you around maybe." He started to move off, then stopped and turned back, a serious expression on his face now. "Hey Annie-" she looked up at him. "It gets better than this you know?" He gestured vaguely at the area around them. "Somebody with as many books as you is going to rock college, you just have to stick it out a while longer okay?"

"S-sure Troy, if you say so…"

But Troy, with a final cheery wave and a goodbye, had already left.

_Troy spoke to me. Me! And he was sweet and kind and…_ Annie's hand drifted up to the spot on her chin where he'd touched her. She didn't stop watching until he caught up with A-Rod and disappeared into the school building.

XXXXXX

(The next day.)

Annie was a bag of nerves. She'd put on the nicest blouse and skirt she owned and was waiting by the entrance to the school with a thank you card that also contained an invite to algebra tuition. _Here he comes!_ Excitement adding to her nerves as she saw Troy walk up to the school entrance, exchanging greetings with fans as he came closer.

"Hi Troy-" she called out, her voice a nervous, high pitched squeak.

"Sorry kid, do I know you?" Troy said in a tone of good natured bemusement.

"Y-yesterday," Annie stammered with dismay. "I-I'm -" But she never got to finish.

"Heeeyy, K-Dog!" Troy yelled cheerily as he spotted another friend and jogged off, leaving the nervous, mousy girl in her best blouse and skirt quite forgotten.

_I just need to be more assertive next time, _Annie thought to herself as her hand, almost without her conscious control, slipped inside the side pocket of her bag. _And I know how, _she though as her hand closed around a small plastic bottle which rattled slightly to the touch.


	8. Troy,Jeff

(Also Minor Jeff/Annie and Troy/Britta)

XXXXXX

_Thwack! Thwack! Thwack - _

Annie woke up, groaning softly at the hammering noise in her head.

_Just how much did I have to drink last night? _She thought to herself. _I don't remember - _

Memories swirled to the surface of her consciousness. The group arriving at Pierce's ski lodge the night before, Troy and Abed finding the fully equipped bar and deciding it was time to play as Tom Cruise in "Cocktail", Annie not realising how alcoholic the drinks were and -

_Oh. _

She cringed slightly at the memory of Shirley holding her hair back while she bent over a toilet bowl while Jeff and Britta shouted at the boys.

_I suppose I'd better face the music, _she thought as she struggled out of bed.

_Thwack! Thwack - _

As Annie woke up, it gradually became clear the hammering noise was not inside her head after all. Her curiosity overcame her embarrassment and she pulled a bathrobe on over her pyjamas and headed out of her room towards the living area, where the sound appeared to be coming from. She helped herself to a coffee and,seeing Britta sitting next to an open French window and looking out, headed over to join her friend.

"What's the noise-" Annie looked out of the window.

"Jeff and Troy are recreating a _Tom of Finland _poster." Britta said acidly.

"Oh!" Annie gasped. The guys were shirtless, powerful muscles flexing rhythmically as they swung large, two handed axes high overhead before bringing them down on the logs they were systematically reducing to firewood.

Britta's sarcasm sailed over Annie. She watched as Troy bent over to pick up another log and put it on the chopping block. She thought she saw a flake of snow land on his bicep and melt from the heat.

"Eyes on your own man, Edison." Britta had seen where Annie was looking and didn't like it.

"Sorry," Annie switched her attention to Jeff just as he was bending over, his skin tight jeans clearly outlining his firm -

"Where's everybody else?" She force herself to look at Britta, who now had a knowing smile on her face.

"Pierce tried to keep up with the guys, only to somehow drive a huge splinter into his ass. Abed and Shirley are taking him to the emergency room."

"Oh dear, I hope he's okay…" Annie's attention had drifted back to Jeff and Troy.

"It got infected, he got taken into ICU and he's been given maybe six hours to live." Britta said sardonically.

"That's nice…" Annie had clearly stopped even pretending to listen to Britta. Britta smirked cynically.

It only took a few more minutes to fill the wood store, at which point Jeff and Troy, as if by mutual agreement, stood up, flexed their muscles and high fived. Jeff picked up his shirt and wiped the sweat off his brow. Walking side by side, they headed back into the cabin.

"Maybe you guys should share a shower?" Britta catcalled. "It'd save on hot water."

Jeff looked sadly at the girls. "They don't understand buddy," he said as he threw an arm over Troy's shoulder.

"Yeah," Troy grinned back at him.

"Do you really think…" Annie's voice was audibly trembling.


	9. Annie,Frankie

"I had a strange chat at work with Jeff today," Frankie said.

Annie looked up from where she was tidying away the dinner dishes. "Oh, what did he say?"

"He said he'd seen the way I looked at you and wanted to know what my intentions were."

"And what did you say?" Annie put down the dishes she was carrying to focus on what Frankie was saying.

"I said my private life was private."

"What did he say to that?" _Not this again - _Annie was remembering Jeff's track record of jealousy over her previous relationships and bracing herself. She took a couple of steps closer to Frankie, ready to offer support if needed. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"Actually, I think it was okay?" Frankie had a puzzled expression on her face, as though struggling to understand unfamiliar feelings. "He said your happiness was very important to him, and if I ever did anything to make you unhappy, we would need to talk again. Then he hugged me, for some reason."

Annie's eyes widened in surprise. _Maybe he has grown after all. _"He's always cared about me," she said, unable to quite meet Frankie's eyes. "But I think he's always thought I was too good for him."

"Annie," Frankie said, her voice taking a slightly sharper tone. "I like Jeff, I even think of him as a friend sometimes, but about this he's right - you are too good for him."

"Frankie!" Annie gasped with shock. She was close enough now to lightly swat the other woman on the arm.

Frankie looked down, a bemused expression on her face. "I can't believe we're talking about Jeff Winger! Is that really what you came over for?"

"You raised the subject," Annie said. "But no". She closed the gap completely so her arms were around the other woman's waist and her head resting on Frankie's chest. One of Frankie's hands settled in the small of her back, the other gently stroked the back of her head. Annie looked up, a broad smile on her face and her eyes wide and shining.

"I came over to study spending forecasts for the next financial year," she said, remembering the story she'd given to Britta and Abed when she left Apartment 303.

"Don't you think we should get to work then?" Frankie said.

Annie's smile if anything got even brighter as she stood on tiptoe to kiss her girlfriend gently on the lips. "Yes, I do." She said.


	10. Troy,Britta

She almost didn't recognise him at first. It wasn't because after almost two years she'd given up hope of ever seeing him again, or because of the smart slacks and button down shirt that had never been his look before. No, it was the confident maturity of his bearing and the self-confidence with which he looked around himself. _He looks like…. he's grown up_, Britta thought to herself.

He saw her and a broad smile spread across his face. _That I do recognise_, Britta thought as an answering smile spread across her face and she clutched her psych textbook nervously to her chest.

"Hi Britta, you look amazing." He said as he hugged her warmly.

"Hi Troy," she said as she clumsily returned the hug, textbook still in hand. "Where have you been?"

"Everywhere." He said simply. A trace of his old youthful enthusiasm came back to him. "I was kidnapped by pirates, and stayed with the King of Jordan - Levar arranged that, to you and me he's a king, to Levar he was an extra on Star Trek-" he grinned. "I've seen the sun rise over the Himalayas with a party of USAid workers and seen it set over the South China Sea. I've dived for pearls in the South Pacific and came closer to dying than I thought was possible when we were caught in a typhoon and realised in the moment that I was more alive than I would ever be again. I've been around the world and it was awesome and terrifying, but mostly awesome." His broad grin was back.

His tone changed from excited back to a normal voice. "I landed back in San Francisco a week ago and Pierce's inheritance was released to me yesterday, I no longer have any obligations to anyone else and can live the life I choose." His grin came back.

Britta fought down a sudden wave of overwhelming envy as she compared this to her life - the long hours working in a bar, every penny going to coursework and rent - and forced herself to be happy for him.

"So if you can do what you want, why are you back at Greendale?" She said.

He didn't answer immediately. "Do you remember what I said when we broke up?" He said.

_When you dumped me_. It still hurt Britta a little after all this time. "Something about you not being grown up enough for a real relationship?" She said.

Troy nodded, slightly apologetically. "Well, I've grown up now." He said as her eyes opened wide in shock. "And I made a promise when it looked like the ship was going to sink in that typhoon that if I made it out alive I would come back here and apologise to you for treating you like that and ask for a second chance." Britta went stiff with shock.

"I'm here because the life I choose to lead has you by my side." He said, finally answering her question. "If you'll have me, that is?" For the first time, he looked nervous.

By way of an answer, Britta dropped her textbook and threw her arms tightly around his neck. There may have been tears shed into the collar of his shirt.

"Is that a yes?" Troy said with his trademark broad smile.

"At least buy me dinner first, you doofus." Britta smiled tearfully back at him.

XXXXXX

Note: The fact that King Abdullah of Jordan is a Trekkie who wangled an appearance on Voyager as an extra is one of my favorite bits of Star Trek trivia.


End file.
